Leaving the meeting exhausted, I realized how being around “parasitic” people caused me to feel drained and depleted – kind of like a leech. Instead of sucking the blood out of me, they were sucking all my energy, positivity and sometimes self-worth if I let them. Bad enough when that happens at work where I am forced to be a captive participant, but reaching into my purse to check my phone, I had 6 missed calls and multiple text messages. Apparently the drama from my meeting at the office was about to extend to my personal life. It was time to become my own exterminator…and fast!
Meanwhile in Wendywoman’s Office…
Wendywoman sat at her desk and sighed, exhausted. Everywhere she looked were parasites that seemed to be sucking the life right out of her.
Taking control of the situation, she reached for her executive weedwacker and ignited the flame thrower, permanently exterminating the life-suckers!
What can you do?
My friend’s phone rang at dinner and I watched intently at the look of despair on his face as the conversation continued. Listening to his “oh no”, I felt my energy being zapped, sure another tough week was ahead of me because something dreadful had happened. “What’s wrong?” I inquired. “My daughter washed her red shirt with my underwear! I now have pink underwear,” he said dramatically. “%$#^&! R u kidding?” I asked. “U must be wearing your underwear on your head to work tomorrow to be so upset!”
Hi, my name is Wendy and I am a recovering dramaholic! There was a time pre-cell phones when I had 6 numbers on speed dial, so I could quickly go from one to the next sharing my drama of the moment, undoubtedly sucking the energy out of my friends who felt compelled to listen. About the time I kicked that worthless habit, caller ID came into existence. Now I really had extra time on my hands because not only did I not waste my time talking about dumb drama, but I could choose not to answer the phone if I was sure one of my dramaholic friends was on the other end. Some people have the handy capability of draining every ounce of energy from you and leave you feeling weak, exhausted and devalued. Often times, these people do this to expel all of their emotional pests onto someone else – they can’t handle the itchy, crawly, creepy feelings they have so it must be easier to give them away. WRONG! It’s one thing if the drama is legitimate; but it has been my experience that a good percentage of the time it is not. It is another version of making mountains out of molehills.
Ask yourself this question: Is my inner circle made up of dramaholics who love to call and burn my ear about stuff that absolutely, positively doesn’t matter? If so, start utilizing caller ID so you can make a CHOICE about how you want to spend your time, remembering that if you take the call, not only do you burn through precious minutes you can’t get back, but you will undoubtedly be drained of energy. Second question: Am I a dramaholic? Do I waste time and energy constantly dramatically repurposing stories for my friends just for the sake of repeating them? If so, today is as good a day as any to make a conscious choice about what you talk about and share with others. Ask yourself: “If I don’t share this, does it matter?” If the answer is no, hang up the phone and tell no one. Instead use the time to invest in yourself.
A challenge to my blog readers…
Pay attention to the people that surround you. Everyone has something to bring to the table, it’s up to you to decide if you want to eat dinner with that something or ask it to leave. Make a conscious choice NOT to spend time with people who will deplete your energy and steal your time, giving you nothing back in exchange. Return the favor to those around you by not sharing frivolous stories disguised as 911 situations. Make it a habit to seek out people who exude love, light and laughter and return the favor by offering the same to them. Who you let into your circle of trust is just as important as who you don’t. Send me an e-mail at wendywoman@wendywoman.com or catch me on Facebook (Wendywoman) to let me know how you are doing.
What parasites will you exterminate from your life this week?
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
Very valuable lesson…surround your self with people who love life, are upbeat and positive…birds of a feather…
The only thing I don’t like about bugs is that sometimes they eat my precious, stinking garbage! It takes a lot of work to make stuff stink this badly, and there they are, munching away!
Wendywoman, are you trying to say that we have a bug problem at Fubar? Don’t worry, I have a solution. You see, some years ago I patented a very effective bug trap. I tried to email the blueprints to you, but I couldn’t make the email work. So I put them in your inbox. We should have a meeting about them.
You know, Phrantic Phoebe kind of looks like a bug. Maybe we can exterminate her as well…
This article is hilarious and so very true. I am no longer into listening to anyone’s drama or portraying my own unless, of course, it’s someone close to me that I can trust. That’s not very many people. Thanks for the words of wisdom. I live by this; just never saw it in print.
Jane, every minute of every day we have thoughts that are either positive or negative. Spending time with the dramaholics only increases the likelihood that at some point you are sucked into their drama. Instead of joining them, bless them and release them to their greater good far far away from you.