Wendywoman Measures Up!

September 18, 2012 · 6 comments

“Where do you come up with your crazy ideas?  Nobody is going to understand what you are talking about!” he said.  I sat across the table smiling while I received his constructive – correction, destructive — criticism.  A lot of time and effort had gone into this project and I was proud of the outcome.  Who cares if I apparently didn’t measure up to his standards? Well, maybe I cared.

Meanwhile at Fubar …

After another brutal meeting focusing on everything Wendywoman hadn’t got done, she had to stop and remind herself how important it is to measure herself against her own set of standards, not somebody else’s!

What can you do?

I’ve said it before, but it is worth saying again:  The good news is you are 100% responsible for your life; the bad news is you are 100% responsible for your life.   Admittedly, it takes a little getting used to because most of us really don’t want to own the circumstances of our life.  It’s easier to blame our problems on the government, spouses, bosses and the list goes on.   We measure our success based on what the system tells us, not what we tell ourselves.  Voted the “Most Likely to Succeed” in high school, did we actually succeed or did we fail?  Depends on whom you ask.

When I woke up from my 10 years in a drunken stupor, somewhere deep down inside I believed that I had the unlimited opportunity to make my life exactly what I wanted it to be, despite all the evidence to the contrary.   In fact, if we measured me 10 years post high school graduation against my classmates, I probably didn’t stack up too well.  But I didn’t let that stop me.  After all, I had nothing to lose.  I was at the bottom so there was nowhere to go but up, so I went for broke.  A couple of simple (but not always easy) universal principles that I followed along the way:

1)            Accept yourself for who you are right now.  Dispose of any judgment about whether your life is good or bad.  Your “bad” life may be great by somebody else’s standards.  Make that your baseline.

2)            Drop the alibi.  Don’t blame others for where you are, and don’t try and make anyone, including yourself, feel guilty about your current circumstances.

3)            Forgive yourself and those around you.  If you aren’t perfect, don’t expect others to be.  We generally grow from the tough lessons we have to learn.

4)            You woke up today so be thankful.  You have another opportunity to change your choices so you can change your life.  Somebody else may not get that chance.

Don’t feel like you have to implement all 4 at the same time.  Just pick one and work on it for a while.   It is amazing how some small changes in your life can produce big results.  Always hold yourself accountable to doing your personal best, not another person’s version of “your” personal best.  After all, you know yourself better than anyone else.

A challenge to my blog readers…

If you are using someone’s scale to measure your success, get rid of it.  Set your own standards for the success of your life and make certain you celebrate incremental progress.  Don’t let a step back ruin your day.  Instead, use that as a tool to learn and move you forward.  Send me an e-mail at wendywoman@wendywoman.com or catch me on Facebook (Wendywoman) to let me know how you are doing.

{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

Bob September 18, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Your best advice to date, WW. Thanks!

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Tenacious Todd September 19, 2012 at 12:34 pm

Wendy,

People should print this and tape it to their desk!!!!!

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Sharkman Zak September 19, 2012 at 5:48 pm

You know what I like to measure, Wendywoman? My sales trophies. And my Porsche. I usually do it while I am on hold during phone calls. Or while Methane Man is blabbing on a conference call. LOVE IT!

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Serendipitous Serena September 19, 2012 at 5:48 pm

It’s sort of funny, Wendywoman. Whenever I try to measure my success, I can’t see the scale very well. I think it might be my rose-tinted glasses, but I’m not sure. Oh, well.

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Methane Man September 19, 2012 at 5:49 pm

Oh my God, Wendywoman. You’re riling the people up again. Where’s my measuring stick, so I can beat you with it?!

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LameO Leo September 19, 2012 at 5:49 pm

Oh, Wendywoman, I’m so glad you’re here. I need your help learning to measure myself. Do you think you could take a look and tell me if my personal set of standards is good enough? I could really use some input…

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