You Are Your Own Kryptonite: How To Find Your Superhero DNA Part 1- Why my broken life was a blessing in disguise

August 12, 2013 · 10 comments

Wouldn’t it be nice if at the moment of your arrival on this planet, you received an instructional manual about how to make the most of a bad situation, just on the off chance you got yourself into one or maybe even two? I sure could have used that manual. Ten painful years of crawling through broken glass because of my addiction left my life littered with health problems, wealth problems and relationship problems just to name a few. What was a drunk and damaged girl like me supposed to do? Realizing I was at the end of my rope, on July 28, 1986, I picked myself up out of the rubble known as my life. Only problem was that there wasn’t enough rope left to hang myself – I couldn’t even get that right! Disappointed by my lies, deceits and failed promises, everyone had deserted me, so nobody was around to save me from the disaster I had created. Now I would have to depend on myself. For more than ten years, I had depended on my bottle of vodka a day to get me through but it was time to grow up and take responsibility for my life, whatever that meant. But what could I do? After all, if you looked up Wendy Kormos in the Webster Dictionary, the definition said “World’s Biggest Loser”.

The best part about being a perceived loser by everyone is you have nothing to lose. We don’t always know it at the time, but sometimes being at the end of your rope is the best place to be. With no money, no resources, no nothin’ – the only option left was to dig down deep inside of myself to see if I could find the strength to somehow change my choices, so that I could change my life. It seemed to me that I had 2 possible choices in the midst of the chaos I had single-handedly created: find the strength to fight or shrink back into the darkness and despair and choose flight. It was just that simple. I was either going to fight for any shreds of greatness that may be buried in me so that I could change my circumstances or, if that was too tough, choose flight and bury myself back in that bottle of vodka, which was the only real companion I had.

I certainly wasn’t going to become a rising star overnight and despite all odds that I would amount to anything this lifetime, I made a conscious decision to fight: To choose success for my life. Fairly certain everyone who knew me would laugh at this notion, I told no one. I didn’t need anyone secretly (or openly for that matter) plotting against me. With each new day of sobriety, another brain cell came back to life and I realized that I was going to have to depend on “self-help” because I didn’t have any money to spend on help from anyone else. As a child, I was a very creative straight A student until I washed it all away with the booze. Maybe, just maybe, buried inside of me that creativity and greatness that hadn’t been seen for more than a decade was still there, waiting to be rediscovered. Maybe greatness didn’t evaporate just because of a string of bad choices. What if those strands of greatness that ran through my entire body, allowing me to achieve anything and everything I wanted in my life, were still there? Probably not but since pretending was the only option available, my morning mantra was born and taped to the bathroom mirror: I am whole. I am perfect. I am strong. I am powerful. I am loving. I am harmonious. I am happy. I am healthy. I am productive. I am prosperous. So what if it appeared to be pure fiction at that moment. There was no scientific test to measure if I had greatness in me so I made a choice to believe that it was there, wherever there was. Just because you couldn’t see my greatness, didn’t mean that it didn’t exist. After all, you couldn’t see the gene that had given me my beautiful blue eyes, but it was there. All I had to do was find my lost greatness. Step by step, the detective work began. I didn’t have much to work with except for a little desire and action, which, as it turned out, was enough. And fortunately, desire and action were free, because I was broke.

To the rest of the world I looked like a less than average, somewhat ordinary person. But I quickly learned that it is often what you can’t see that determines who you really are. I knew I had some hidden greatness and I was not only determined to find it, but stop anyone else who would try and convince me it wasn’t there. I needed to build up my strength so I could defeat the enemies of daily life and become all I was destined to be. The truth is, you never know how strong you are until strong is the only remaining choice you have. With ten years of ugliness behind me, I used everything I learned on the streets to move my life forward. No obstacle I ran into was as difficult as the time I spent mired in my addiction. End result: my personal life and professional life are more than I ever dreamed of as a child. But how did you do it Wendy? With one foot in a grave, how did you make such a fabulous comeback? Join me next week for Part 2 of my 10 part series – You Are Your Own Kryptonite – Why making minimum payment into your life gets you nowhere.

{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Kathryn Bryant August 12, 2013 at 2:10 pm

Wow Wendy, you are an inspiration. Love the morning mantra as I am totally sold on affirming one’s power, happiness, love etc – I believe that everyone has some sort of greatness in them, the trick is uncovering it (however well hidden) and doing something about it.

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Wendywoman August 12, 2013 at 10:06 pm

Thank you Kathryn! You are so right. Everyone has some sort of greatness in them and I made a corporate career out of helping people find it when everyone else had turned their backs, believing failure was imminent.

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Althea de las Estrellas August 12, 2013 at 11:49 pm

Powerful, Wendy! Looking forward to the rest of the series. Great idea to make a series out of this. I am moved by your story and the way you tell it, specially. Seeing the Greatness inside yourself, even when no one else does, and bringing it out for the world to see is what most inspires me. Kudos to you amazing lady! <3

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Lori Reed August 13, 2013 at 5:33 pm

What a great energy you have Wendy–the real deal.

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Todd Waites August 13, 2013 at 5:37 pm

AWESOME. Wendy is the real thing…pay close attention to her!

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Wendywoman August 13, 2013 at 5:44 pm

Thanks Lori for the kind words!

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Gayle Zientek August 14, 2013 at 12:38 am

Wendy,
I read your post in awe…so many things going through my mind right now. You and I were destined to be friends. A simple card brought us together. You have a story and an inspiration to share with the world and I’m going to help connect you to those in my world :-)

Thank you for finding me after a brief encounter in 2008.
Gayle

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Paula Parker August 14, 2013 at 8:34 am

You never seem to amaze me, especially since I regard you as my Guardian Angel when you helped me achieve a very big goal, but now I’m in total awe of your greatness after reading the above. I’m hooked and anxious to continue reading for the next 10 weeks. I know how much it will help me and others to find our Superhero DNA. Thank you very much – love you!

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Rita Hodges August 14, 2013 at 1:37 pm

Wendy,
I love reading about your life story. You are quite an inspiration to me. You are an admirable woman. Every time I read something of yours something shakes lose within me in reassuring that I do have the patentual for true greatness where ever it may be hidden. You give me hope in uncovering my dreams and to pursue them inspite of myself because I got the devil at my back door. Thank you for being apart of my webpage in Celebrating Women in Recovery, because even if you have just reached one person, you have accomplished greatness. God bless you in all that you do. :)

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Wendywoman August 14, 2013 at 2:26 pm

Thank you Rita for those kind words!

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